Happy New Year! As a new year's treat, I thought that I would provide a laugh or two by sharing some stories from a customer service help line that I worked on.
Fresh out of University, I took a job with a company that provided the helpline support for numerous Agricultural and Residential chemical companies. I started out on a help line for a certain residential chemical and fertilizer company that will remain un-named but I am sure that you all have a product or two of theirs under your kitchen sink or out in your garage. Most of the calls were customers calling to double check application rates or such but there was a few complaints everyday too. Here's a few that I remember.
Fresh out of University, I took a job with a company that provided the helpline support for numerous Agricultural and Residential chemical companies. I started out on a help line for a certain residential chemical and fertilizer company that will remain un-named but I am sure that you all have a product or two of theirs under your kitchen sink or out in your garage. Most of the calls were customers calling to double check application rates or such but there was a few complaints everyday too. Here's a few that I remember.
One day I received a complaint call from a customer who had applied the companies standard lawn fertilizer (30-0-3) about a week previous. His lawn was now covered in brown and crispy streaks.
Me - How many bags did you use?
Him - 1
Me - What size is your lawn?
Him - Well, the average city lawn.
Me - Could estimate the measurements?
Him - Oh, probably 20 foot by 20 foot or something like that.
Me - Did you read the label before you applied the fertilizer? You applied 10x the rate needed.
Me - Did you read the label before you applied the fertilizer? You applied 10x the rate needed.
Him - No, the bag said it was guaranteed not to burn so I used it all.
Me - What kind of spreader did you use to apply it?
Him - I didn't want to buy one so I just opened the bag and spread it with my hands.
Another complaint call that is one of my all time favorites was from a woman who had applied a certain glyphosate product to her nice green growing lawn about two weeks earlier. As you could imagine, her lawn was now brown and dead.
Me - Did you read the label on the product it says "will control any green living plant"
Her - I know, that's why I applied it to my lawn.
Me - But since the label says "any green living plant" you should not have applied it to your grass.
Her - I don't consider grass a plant, it is something else.
Me - Grass is a plant, and the glyposate controls all living plants.
Her - No, grass is like astro turf and the product shouldn't have killed it. You guarantee it so you will be putting a new lawn in for me.
One more. A customer had called with a complaint. She had applied an broad leaf herbicide to her lawn to control dandelions a few days earlier and now there were circles of dead grass where the dandelions used to be.
Me - How did you mix the chemical?
Her - I mixed the concentrate half and half with water and applied it.
Me- Did you read the label first? You only needed 60ml concentrate with 1L of water.
Her - I thought that half and half would be better for spot treatments.
Me - What kind of sprayer did you use?
Her - Oh, I don't have a sprayer so I used my watering can and poured it on.
To be serious now, this is why I support a pesticide ban for residential property owners unless they are properly trained in the product usage or have the pesticides applied by a licensed applicator.
LMAO! I love this post. People are dumb.
ReplyDelete